Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales is the watered down sequel that Studio C predicted it would be.
Synopsis
What do you call a movie that is about a cursed Spanish madman, bent on revenge and trapped in the Bermuda Triangle, hunting down a famous outlaw who is down on his luck, but has a chance to redeem himself by finding yet another mystical item lost to the ocean depth and only by coincidence does everything fall in to place so he can find it and save the day? The newest Disney movie!
While Pirates has never been able to live up to the glory of the original, Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales does rank high in the series of five as more enjoyable.
Review: Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales
PG-13 | 2h 09 mins | Fantasy, Adventure, Action | May 26, 2017
Did I Like It?
My overall feeling towards the show.
I wasn’t sure what to expect with this movie. Just like Studio C joked in their Teddy’s Story Joint sketch, these movies get watered down with each one. Now that we’re only the fifth and potential final movie, there’s not much left. Thankfully, I still enjoyed the show. Sure there were parts that went well passed ridiculous, but most of the show was funny, exciting, and made me want to be a pirate.
Napability?
How easily could I sleep through this.
With over 50 flashes of lightning (yes, I counted) there isn’t a chance in the seven seas that I could nap through this one. The movie was also well paced. The slow movements never dragged and the action never went too long. Plus the jokes were thrown in right when I needed a few to keep my mind from wandering.
What’s It Worth?
How much effort/money would I put towards this show.
I saw this in theaters. Totally worth it. I feel that if I would have waited to see Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales at home, I wouldn’t have been able to enjoy the majesty of the sea and the pirates ships and all the other grand things this offers. I also plan on owning this movie because I hope to eventually complete the series in my collection. That way, I can show them to my future children and ensure that they become hooked to things like pirates instead of other unsavory Disney properties like Frozen. Eww.
How Often Would I Watch It?
The frequency that I would watch this.
Let’s be honest. If I’m going to watch Pirates of the Caribbean it’s going to be the first one. The only reason I would pull this one out is if I was in the mood for Pirates but also in the mood for a comedy. It’s not often that I’m in the mood for a Piratical Comedy…Comedic Pirate…Argh-Com? Any who, if I ever am looking for that I know just where to look.
Any “I’m Out!” Moments?
Moments where I mentally or physically check out of the show or other problems I have.
Some of the biggest “I’m Out!” moments were when things just went a little too far. They took a gag and turned it into a “Really? Come on, guys…” kind of moment where it detracted from the movie. I won’t go into much detail here, but you’ll know what I’m talking about when you see it.
I also thought that Henry Turner (Will & Elizabeth’s son) and Carina (Daughter of *Spoiler*) could have used more time to develop into fully fledged characters. They were way more interesting than Will & Elizabeth and look at how much screen time they got. 3 whole movies! Not fair.
They also contradicted themselves when it came to origins of Jack’s Compass. In the second movie, it’s mentioned that he received it from Tia Dalma. In this movie, he gets it from the captain he inherited the title from. What’s up with that?!
Another thing, that bothered me is the unnecessary attempts to pull on my heart strings. Listen Disney. I came to watch pirates do piratey things. Not get emotional. Stick to what I want and leave my favorite characters alone. This is the second movie, you’ve tried to pull this kind of stunt and it’s not a good thing. Stop it!
Finally, you may be surprised to hear that there is a post-credits scene. Most people miss it because it’s actually after all the credits. While interesting, it left the door open for a 6th movie. That’s right. A 6th movie! I don’t know how much more I can handle from this series and I might just have to call “I’m Out!” from this entire series if they’re really planning on a 6th movie.
Final Score for Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales
7/10
Studio C got it right. They really do get water-down every time.
Have you seen Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Men Tell No Tales in theaters? Let us know how you would rate this “final” installment and leave a comment below on where you would take the series if it kept going.